from the moment I woke up this morning, I was just flustered. I was tired, running late, and had a million things on my mind. I show up to the church to grab the credit card so I can go get breakfast for everyone, and the building is locked. It takes me 5 minutes and lots of cursing to get the code right (and I think an old man was about to call the police on me). Then, halfway to Krispy Kreme, I realize I've forgotten the discount cards. When buying juice, I realize I've forgotten to check the refrigerator to see if there was juice left over from last week, so I have no idea how much juice to buy. I finally get back to the church and try to settle in for Sunday School. The kids are more in to eating doughnuts than meeting me (no surprise). One of the church members was asked to give his testimony today, but I focus on only about 10 minutes of it because I'm too busy trying to think about the testimony I've been asked to give at the end of the summer. After Sunday School, I head to worship. For some reason, instead of being in the spirit of worship, I find myself dwelling in the worst memories I have of the past 6 months. New Year's, failing friendship, counseling, and literally every other miserable moment my memories could find. I sit in service just feeling waves of guilt and sadness, mixed in with frustrations about why these memories were resurfacing now.
and then I realize.
Marissa told us on our first day to be right with God before we come into work in the morning. If we're not, Satan can find his way in and throw everything off.
That was it. Satan took advantage of my flustered, weak mind and heart and jumped right in, ready to make me feel worthless and sad and far from Christ. I never used to really think of Satan as a real and active being, but the more I let Christ be a real and active being in my life, the more I'm aware of Satan's presence and power. and he's strong.
But not stronger than Christ, who fills me with peace, happiness, and love.
and the ability to be goofy.
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