certainty.

i know in my heart that i don't want to ever go there again.

i know in my heart that he is not the one like i thought.

i know in my heart that i am honestly and truly better with out him.

i know in my heart that i do not love him anymore.

but i have to admit...it still hurts.  and i think my heart wants justice, which unfortunately is not mine to give.  i think the hurt resides in the fact that remorse seems to be non-existent.  i think i'm jealous of the friendship he's maintained with all our mutual friends, only because he's doing a better job at that than i am.  there it is.  i'm jealous that it's been so easy for him, when my selfish heart feels like i'm the one who deserves all the happiness.